So I wrote a post awhile back about old Heather and new Heather. And it seems that this needs to be re-visited.
Because apparently new Heather comes out to play only when she feels comfortable to do so. In big groups, old Heather stifles new Heather. She doesn't let her talk. She gives into torment. She believes that she doesn't have anything to offer. I've realized that nearing the end of this last semester, old Heather was doing this more and more frequently. Overpowering new Heather. Sure, new Heather would come out at Valleybrook, VYC, and Navs, but she was letting old Heather get the best of her when it came time for school, work, or RAing. I didn't realize until a conversation I had yesterday that because of the way I was living out those areas of my life, I was really letting old Heather live them out.
I would see the mandatory, more mundane activities of life and label them as less important than the things that I am passionate about. But really, God wants my best in everything, He wants new Heather, real Heather, Heather He created me to be, to flourish in every aspect of my life, not just the things I'm passionate about. He wants me to be who I was created to be at school, work, and as an RA. He wants the same passion and drive that I put into my "more important" activities to be the same for those activities that I deem less important. Because the truth of the situation is that He has put me here. He has put me in school, as an RA, and at work to be who He created me to be to all the people I come in contact with.
God wants me to be someone very specific. And I know some of that picture. Not the whole thing. He is always revealing more of who he wants me to be. And my part in this is just to obey. To say "yes" to Jesus when he gives the simple call- "Follow me."
Are there areas of your life that you deem less important, and thus aren't living out who you are meant to be?
I feel like this is also something the most people have to struggle with at one point... one of the many things we've talked about frequently at VYC. You're soo right, He put us in certain places and situations for a reason and we need to give our all to Him in all the we do, whether we enjoy it or not! Obedience doesn't exactly mean that what we need to do is safe or easy... which is why understand how you slip into "Old Heather", it's safe and familiar to you, right? I challenge you to, despite whatever fear or torment is there, stay true to yourself.... because you're SO right, you were created for SO much more than what "Old Heather" seems to have settled for. PLUS, your voice is one meant to be heard...it's beautiful... and I don't know a single person that doesn't want to hear what you have to say. As for your question at the end, yes... I relate with you on the whole school thing! Because I'm not passionate about it, I don't always put my all into it! ;)
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