Love=Inconvenience

I love this quote so much that I've actually entertained thoughts of getting it tattooed on my body (I'm not going to... but...). 

It sums up so well what everyday love looks like. It takes out the gushy feelings and the prerequisite of liking someone to love them. It shows that love is an action, a choice. Love has to do with me and how I act and what I do, not with how the other person makes me feel. It has to do with my response to situations, not the situations themselves. 

Love is serving when I don't feel like it, love is going out of my way to help another, love is inconveniencing myself for the sake of someone else. 

Easter is right around the corner, and if there's any greater example of how love is inconvenient, I don't know it. Jesus died and rose again for you, for me. He didn't do it because it was the convenient, easy thing to do. He didn't do it because we were so lovely and wonderful and created all these gushy feeling in Him. 

He did it because He loves us so much that He was willing to serve, go out of His way, inconvenience Himself, and ultimately sacrifice His life for us. He did it because His Father loves us so much that He was willing to send His only Son to save us, wretched sinners that we are. 1 John 4:10 puts it this way—

This is love: not that we loved God, but that he loved us and sent his Son as an atoning sacrifice for our sins.

God sacrificed His Son, Jesus sacrificed His life. Both were enormous inconveniences, and both showed us their love. Both sacrifices have made a way for us to have new life and eternal relationship with our Maker.

This Easter, I'm thankful that God didn't only love us when it was convenient. I'm thankful that Jesus ultimately said "Not my will, but yours be done" in that garden so long ago. I'm thankful that we have the highest example of love as inconvenience. I'm thankful that I don't have to try and love like that in my own power.

I'm thankful that Jesus came to earth, lived a sinless life, died on the cross to carry my sin and shame, rose again three days later, ascended to heaven where He now sits at the right hand of God, and invites me into relationship with Him and offers me eternal life. And the offer and invitation are for any who would receive it!  But to all who did receive him, who believed in his name, he gave the right to become children of God (John 1:12). We can trust Him, because He is worthy of our trust. He loves us beyond measure!

On Feeling Inadequate

Lately I've been feeling rather inadequate. Inadequate to be a loving wife. Inadequate to lead ministry. Inadequate to follow Christ well. And it's pretty easy to get down on myself, until God's Word shines light into the darkness and I see that feeling inadequate is actually a really, really good thing when you have a more-than-adequate God. Check it out—Not that we are sufficient in ourselves to claim anything as coming from us, but our sufficiency is from God. (2 Corinthians 3:5) 

I really like how one commentary sums it up: There is nothing in us that allows us to claim that we are capable of doing this work. In other words, I can never claim the glory because there is nothing in me that makes me capable, except Christ working in me... so Christ always gets the glory. And there is never any reason that I should believe that I can do life on my own. There is never any reason to believe that I don't need God working in me, that I don't need His ever-present power and strength.

God is writing the story of my life—and I'm so grateful that He is. Because if I was writing it I would always be confident and adequate and capable—never lacking anything. I would be able to do it all on my own. But then I wouldn't ever have to rely and depend on Christ. His strength would never be made perfect in my weakness. He would never get the glory. And a story like that—it honestly doesn't sound like a very good story. In fact, a story without an all-powerful God working His power through weak, inadequate human beings wouldn't even be a story worth reading. 

So next time you find yourself feeling inadequate, rather than beating yourself up over it, why not invite God to work through your inadequacies? Why not ask Him to show up in big ways and be your all-sufficient power? Acknowledge that His strength is made perfect in your weaknesses, and allow Him to get the glory for any work in your life—because He's the one who did the work in the first place, and He will continue it on until completion. What a good God we serve!

When Anxiety Gets the Best of You

I'm not normally one who is burdened with excessive amounts of anxiety. I'm usually a pretty happy-go-lucky, we'll-cross-that-bridge-when-we-get-there kinda gal. But there are times—hours, days, weeks, seasons—that I find myself overcome with anxiety. And this past week just so happened to be one of them.

You see, these past few months have felt a bit like limbo. Nothing too extreme was happening in our lives, there wasn't much change, and we were waiting on what felt like a hundred things that just needed time. 

And then this week happened. Let's just say that each day has brought about some big change, decision, or stressor—from overseas trips, to housing situations, to future career goals, to phone calls with pharmacists and doctors—it's been one crazy week.

But it's also been one wonderful week. I have seen God answer our repeated prayers from the last months. I have seen Him provide. I have felt His comfort and peace as I have cried out to Him for guidance and strength.

I was again reminded that God is the only one who can give complete peace amidst anxiety-inducing circumstances. I was ushered into His presence where I experienced His grace. He did not leave me alone. He was right there, guiding, comforting, speaking words of truth and wisdom. All I had to do was ask.

Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. 

—Philippians 4:6–7

God can guard our hearts and our minds against anxiety, if only we ask Him, if only we lay before Him our desires, fears, anxieties, requests, longings. When we give it all to Him, He gives to us, in return, His peace, which surpasses all understanding. That's a pretty good trade, if you ask me.

So if you're starting to feel that anxiety creep in—that feeling of tightness in your chest, or shortness of breath, or being on the verge of tears—turn to Him! Turn to the only one who can fully remove that anxiety and replace it with unspeakable peace.

Discipline or Regret... or Not?

Do you ever have days where you just feel like you were so undisciplined, or lazy, or didn't get done what you wanted to? I do. And I had one recently. And it led to a whole lot of regret. It led to anxiety. It led to beating myself up and feeling like I had made all the wrong choices. It made me long for time travel (come on smart, science-y husband!). But seriously, I had a pit in my stomach, wishing that I could go back and start the day over. I was filled with regret.

//via

I've heard it said that everyone must choose one of two pains: the pain of discipline or the pain of regret. That really resonates with me. I get it. But I also think there's a third choice: Mercy. Grace. Forgiveness. When we don't choose discipline and start to feel regret, God offers us new mercies. Every single morning.

//via

He offers us hope and love and mercy every single day, so that we don't have to wallow in the past, whether it is looming with darkness and hurts and sins or simply unfinished to-do lists and minor disappointments. 

Praise God that I don't have to live in regret, even when in the worldly sense that's where I should be. Praise Him that He makes every day new and gives me second and third and 562 and one million chances. Praise Him that although discipline is the better choice, and regret is real, He still invites me to live in the here and now and to dwell on what He is doing and has done, not what I have failed to do. His mercies are new every morning!

Interrupted

I recently finished reading Interrupted by Jen Hatmaker [and forcing it into Loverboy's hands/ears every couple chapters or so] and it is kinda bad-good. I got the book a few years back for free and it has sat on my bookshelf ever since. It's moved with me from place to place, been shuffled around, but always just sitting on my bookshelf. Staring at me. Because I knew what it was about, and I didn't want to read it. I knew it was going to challenge and convict me and I guess I just haven't been in a place where I want to be smacked upside the head until recently. 

So about a couple months ago I picked it up and put it on the desk. Then on the coffee table. Then in my purse. One step closer to me actually reading it. Then I actually started reading it. Then I finished it. And it's just what I expected. A good smack upside the head.

//via

But I'm not really sure what else to say about it. Except that we've been doing a lot of thinking and dreaming and talking and planning around here. And that the above quote decently describes the book and our thoughts.

Here's what one reviewer on Amazon said about the book. [I'm about to quote somebody who quotes somebody. Get ready.]

I feel sometimes like we are all just "playing church", and that can be a suffocating place at times (just being honest) because... well, here's the way Jen put it: "Why did I spend all my time blessing blessed people who should be on the giving side of the equation by now?" (p. 21) Answer: because its safe and because its comfortable. 

YES. Safe and comfortable. I am way too obsessed with being both of those things. But really, I'm tired of feeding the obese, clothing the fashionistas, giving medicine to the perfectly healthy, "blessing the blessed," as Jen puts it. 

I want to feed the hungry, clothe the naked, help heal the sick. I want to do the things that Jesus tells us to do. I want to rid myself of this obsession with safety and comfort. 

But it starts one small baby step at a time, I think. It starts with giving to the homeless Native American man who waves at me from the corner on my way to and from work. It starts with doing things I wouldn't normally do, with people I wouldn't normally do them with. It starts with noticing those who I don't usually notice. It starts small, but I know where my Jesus has called me. I know what He has asked of me.

For I was hungry and you gave me food, I was thirsty and you gave me drink, I was a stranger and you welcomed me, I was naked and you clothed me, I was sick and you visited me, I was in prison and you came to me.’ Then the righteous will answer him, saying, ‘Lord, when did we see you hungry and feed you, or thirsty and give you drink?  And when did we see you a stranger and welcome you, or naked and clothe you? And when did we see you sick or in prison and visit you?’  And the King will answer them, ‘Truly, I say to you, as you did it to one of the least of these my brothers, you did it to me.’ —Matthew 25:35–40

Also, a few articles that have been wrecking lately, that I mentioned in my A Year in Blogging post: 

Dear World: Let's Stop Giving Our Crap to the Poor
# Blessed
Rich and Poor | The Question That Wrecked Us Both

Weekend Wrap-Up

It's Friday ya'll! Bring on the weekend! Tonight and tomorrow morning we have a membership class for our church [no, it's not a slumber party, but how awesome (and weird) would that be?!]. Then tomorrow afternoon and evening we're hittin' up Nickelodeon Universe at the MOA with a couple friends! I am super psyched since my love for amusement parks is up there on the list with my love for my husband, sleep, and food. [in that order].

Sundays around here are automatically football afternoons during the fall, which means I get a couple hours to spend time with my hubby, nap, and eat [hey! see how that works out with my favorite things?? No rollercoasters though...bummer].

So that's what I've got planned for the weekend... along with a couple things we need to do like set up our new printer and get going on the name change process as well as order thank yous for our wedding. Cheers to the weekend! Here's some inspiration for you!

Truth to Rest In

//via

Isaiah 46:4 - ” I am he, I am he who will sustain you. I have made you and I will carry you; I will sustain you and I will rescue you.”

Slow Cooker Cinnamon Almonds

1 1/2 C. Sugar 

1 1/2 C. Brown Sugar 

3 Tbsp. Cinnamon 

1/8 tsp. Salt 

1 Egg White 

2 tsp. Vanilla 

3 Cups Almonds 

1/4 C. Water

[Here for recipe directions and cook time]

Cute Seasonal DIY

I love these little stumps turned candle holders... especially with the added gold touch. We had similar candle holders at a our wedding... thanks to a wonderful friend! :)

//via

Hope you all have a wonderful weekend... resting in the truth that God sustains you, and maybe even trying out the recipe or DIY if you're weekend isn't looking quite as busy as mine [but let's be real... life is NEVER too busy for delicious slow clooker recipes!].

Guest Post: Expressions of Gratitude

Editor's Note: I am so grateful (hehe) to be bringing you a new guest post today! Since the wedding is right around the corner I thought I'd feature some lovely ladies that I think you should know. So without further ado, meet Tanya. Tanya and I met a couple years ago in beautiful Colorado during our training for Navigators Staff. She exudes peace and joy wherever she goes. Tanya lives in the Midwest with her husband, David, who is attending Medical School. Their life so far has been everything but what they have expected or even hoped. Tanya’s blog, Blissfully Sweet, is an avenue for her to express the joys of life happening now. There is joy in life. And it is meant to be shared and celebrated. 

Expressions of Gratitude

I first started blogging to document things I was grateful for. When I first started my journey to cultivating a heart of joy based on truth and thanksgiving, I had no idea what I would discover. I did not realize the darkness of my ungrateful heart and did not know the profound intimacy thanksgiving would create with my Savior.

I read books related to the topic of thanksgiving. Many of which challenged my thinking and increased my knowledge about the discipline. If you haven’t read 1000 Gifts by Ann Voskamp or Choosing Gratitude by Nancy Leigh DeMoss, I suggest ordering either book now. Although these authors’ wisdom helped me grow in this area, the reflection of thanksgiving in the Spirit of Jesus is what made me choose to have gratitude in my life (because let’s face it, if we are not thankful, we are choosing to be ungrateful and discontent).

Jesus’ expressions of gratitude in the gospels provide practical application to cultivate a heart of thanksgiving.

Jesus expressed worship and awe.After the return of the 72 in Luke 10, "he [Jesus] rejoiced in the Holy Spirit and said, ‘I thank you Father...’" Jesus was in awe of the Trinity’s work and his response was to thank the source.

Singing to the Lord is a wonderful aid in worshiping and expressing thankfulness. “Sing to the Lord with thanksgiving; make melody to our God on the lyre!” Psalm 147:7. Some of my favorite songs to sing are “10,000 Reasons” by Matt Redman, “It Is Well With My Soul” by Horatio Spafford, and “The House of God Forever” by Jon Foreman.

Jesus expressed trust and surrender to God’s will. Many of us are familiar with the story of Lazarus in John 11; how Jesus raised him from the dead. But what I have overlooked so many times is found in verse 41, “And Jesus lifted up his eyes and said, ‘Father, I thank you that you have heard me.’ “ He expressed “thanks” before he commanded Lazarus to come out. How often do we give thanks as an afterthought?

Doesn’t the test of faith and act of surrendering to God’s will happen without knowing the outcome? Gratefully trust Him with all things.

“Give thanks in all circumstances for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you.” 1 Thessalonians 5:18

A great way to foster all things is to keep a journal of things to be thankful for.

Jesus expressed sacrifice and service. Knowingly at the end of Jesus’ life, in the midst of betrayal and a trial that would lead to his crucifixion, He gave thanks (Luke 22:17,19) at the Last Supper. He was grateful for the sacrifice he would make and the service he was sent to complete for our justification and salvation. We too can express gratitude and speak up, offering sacrifice and service for the sake of the gospel.

“One generation shall commend your works to another, and shall declare your mighty acts.

...

“They shall speak of the might of your awesome deeds, and I will declare your greatness. They shall pour forth the fame of your abundance goodness and shall sing aloud of your righteousness.”
Psalm 145:4, 6–7

Giver > Gifts

Do you desire what God can give you more than you desire Him?

This would be like [as ladies] yearning for the lawn to be mown, the car to be fixed, and the spiders to be killed—when in reality we're really yearning for the intimacy with a man from whom those gifts might flow. It's the same with God- when I'm yearning for spiritual gifts, or blessings, or answers to prayers, I'm actually desiring the intimacy with God that those gifts would naturally flow from.

We should choose the Giver over the gifts. The Creator over the creation. But even as I write this I know there's still something wrong with my thinking... as I write "should."

So my simple reminder today and probably for the rest of my life [because let's be real, lessons like this aren't just learned overnight] is this: Giver > Gifts. The Giver is more important than, bigger than, and to be desired, loved, worshipped, enjoyed, savored, yearned for, and thanked over the gifts.

Notice my reminder isn't Giver Gifts. Gifts are still good! Heaven knows my heart flutters for my man every time he saves me from a giant spider [one of the non-perks of an older place], but if that's all I want him around for then there's a problem. Gifts are good. The Giver is better. Seek HIM first, friends. He is bigger. He is better. All good things flow from Him.

But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you. —Matthew 6:33

At Your Darkest

Uff. That's kinda heavy stuff when you think about it. When you really think about the darkest of dark places you've been. The things you've done, said, thought. The attitudes you've had. The desires you've followed. The way you've lived your life. And yet Jesus still loved you through it all. He wasn't disgusted with you. He wasn't angry at you. He didn't turn away from you. He loved you. He loves you.

I know I've been to some pretty dark places. And I pray that I have already experienced my "darkest." But at mid-twenties I kind of doubt it and so I pray that I will remember this—that Jesus loves me, even at my darkest.

//image via

P.S. Feeling stuck in a dark place? Read this letter and don't be shy to throw me a line!

Springs of Life

I want springs, rivers, oceans of life to flow from my heart. But to be honest, I haven't been real vigilant with my heart lately. I haven't been filling it with what it needs for life to be flowing out of it. I haven't been guarding it against apathy, busyness, and distractions. 

Jesus is life. Spending intimate time with Him and in His Word is what will cause these springs, rivers, and oceans to flow. It's what will make me a loving friend, roommate, co-worker, fiance, and child of God. It's what will grow in me peace and patience and self-control. It's what will create in me a deeper thirst for more of Him.

It just isn't cutting it to get convicted by a sermon I hear on a Sunday or a cutesy Bible verse I see on Pinterest. I need to have a vital, continuous love relationship with Jesus. I need to be VIGILANT to keep my heart. To guard my heart. The NIV states it this way—

"Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it."

Everything I do flows from the state of my heart. So if I'm not filling my heart with beautiful Truth, then what's going to flow out? I don't want to stick around in this non-vigilance to find out, because one thing I know, is that without Jesus, things get down-right ugly. Can I get an 'amen?'

//image via etsy

All There

Holy Caboose, this is hard! To be "all there." To be fully present and engaged with whoever you are with, wherever you are at. 

No. Matter. What. 

Regardless of how much sleep you got, or how hard you've worked this week, or how fried your brain feels. Because let's be honest, there will most likely always be something that we could use as an excuse to check out, to un-engage. 

But checking out isn't really loving. It's loving on our terms. When we feel energized enough. Or focused enough. Or fill-in-the-blank-here enough.

With that being said, it's also not loving to yourself or others to not have boundaries. Boundaries help us to get enough rest, to have enough margin, and to take care of ourselves. All of which are entirely important for us to be present and engaged. 

So how do we be all there? 

We can start by finding our rest in God. Psalm 62:1 puts it well: "My soul finds rest in God alone." I'm starting to realize that as a believer, I don't get rest the same way the world does. I can nap or watch a movie or just be- which are all fine things- but if I'm not getting rest in the Lord, I can still feel just as frazzled as before. 

In the past month I have heard three separate talks where the speaker references Matthew 11:28-30. THREE talks, guys! I think I should probably pay attention to this. So anywho, Jesus says "Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.”

It's a pretty famous verse about rest. But it's SO good because it comes straight from Jesus' mouth. He invites us to come. He offers rest. Real rest. Not just sit-on-the-couch-and-surf-facebook rest. He wants to teach us. He wants us to find rest for our souls and trade our heavy burdens for His light one.

So that's what I'm embracing today. That's the step I'm taking to become better at being "all there." At living fully alive and present and engaged. To find my rest in God alone. To come to Jesus and to learn what rest for my soul looks like. 

Best and Worst

"I have seen the best of you, and the worst of you, and I choose both." How we as humans long to hear another human say that to us! How we long for deep, meaningful relationships, for intimacy, for love. How we ache to be known fully and still accepted, to be truly vulnerable before another and still embraced. To be unconditionally loved.

What a gift it is be loved this way. How rare and uncommon, yet beautiful. 

Unconditional love is not loving someone in spite of their flaws, mistakes, and imperfections, it's loving them in view of those flaws, mistakes, and imperfections. It's not ignoring their weaknesses and just loving their strengths, but choosing to love them- strengths, weaknesses, and all. 

Unconditional love is a choice we must make as we see the light and the dark in people. It's a choice that requires us to face the darkness inside ourselves. Because really, when we see others' imperfections we are often reminded of our own. So it's easier to sweep those flaws under the rug and just keep on loving that person, pretending that whatever we've just discovered about them doesn't exist.

But that's not really loving them. That's only loving a portion of them, a version of them that doesn't line up with reality. Truly loving someone involves acknowledging their imperfections, their flaws, their weaknesses and mistakes and saying "I see you as you truly are, and I still love you. I know what you've done, but that doesn't change my love for you. I want you in my life and I want to walk this path with you." 

Even as I write this I know it sounds impossible. I am overwhelmed by this kind of love we are called to show to our brothers and sisters. I wonder how I could ever get to a point where I am not constantly trying to self-protect, or numb out my own darkness, or live in a fantasy world where people don't hurt me. But I know it is possible. But not by my own strength. Not through my own energy that I conjure up.

This kind of love- this unconditional love for people in view of their imperfections and flaws is possible because God showed us this same love. He showed us His never stopping, never giving up, unbreaking, always and forever love by sending Jesus. And Jesus showed us this unconditional love that while we were still shaking our angry, entitled fists at God He chose to switch places with us and die, crushed by the weight of our sins, while we are given a new life, if we choose to believe.

And as we follow Jesus, we are called to this same love... this never stopping, never giving up, unbreaking, always and forever love. This love that loves in view of others' imperfections, not just in spite of.

1 John 3:16 
This is how we know what love is: Jesus Christ laid down his life for us. And we ought to lay down our lives for our brothers.

Weekend Wrap-Up

[Inspiration.]

[Yum.]

"Heathah Buttah"

8 oz dark chocolate almond milk

1 frozen banana

1 big spoonful peanut butter

Blend in a blender. Pour. Enjoy for breakfast, lunch, dinner, or snack. (Or all of the above!)

[Music.]

My new favorite rapper: Andy Mineo

(especially 1:50-3:00)

[Truth.]

Romans 8:1-17

(Working on memorizing it this summer!)

1 There is therefore now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus. 2 For the law of the Spirit of life has set you free in Christ Jesus from the law of sin and death. 3 For God has done what the law, weakened by the flesh, could not do. By sending his own Son in the likeness of sinful flesh and for sin, he condemned sin in the flesh, 4 in order that the righteous requirement of the law might be fulfilled in us, who walk not according to the flesh but according to the Spirit. 5 For those who live according to the flesh set their minds on the things of the flesh, but those who live according to the Spirit set their minds on the things of the Spirit. 6 For to set the mind on the flesh is death, but to set the mind on the Spirit is life and peace. 7 For the mind that is set on the flesh is hostile to God, for it does not submit to God's law; indeed, it cannot. 8 Those who are in the flesh cannot please God. 9 You, however, are not in the flesh but in the Spirit, if in fact the Spirit of God dwells in you.Anyone who does not have the Spirit of Christ does not belong to him. 10 But if Christ is in you, although the body is dead because of sin, the Spirit is life because of righteousness. 11 If the Spirit of him who raised Jesus from the dead dwells in you, he who raised Christ Jesus from the dead will also give life to your mortal bodies through his Spirit who dwells in you.12 So then, brothers, we are debtors, not to the flesh, to live according to the flesh. 13 For if you live according to the flesh you will die, but if by the Spirit you put to death the deeds of the body, you will live. 14 For all who are led by the Spirit of God are sons of God. 15 For you did not receive the spirit of slavery to fall back into fear, but you have received the Spirit of adoption as sons, by whom we cry, “Abba! Father!” 16 The Spirit himself bears witness with our spirit that we are children of God, 17 and if children, then heirs—heirs of God and fellow heirs with Christ, provided we suffer with him in order that we may also be glorified with him.

[DIY.]

This really makes me want to start another art journal!

[image here.]

The Spotlight

These last couple weeks have been a whirlwind... Nebraska, Colorado, Minneapolis, and now the Wisconsin Dells where the Summer Training Program I am working at this summer is already in full swing. So needless to say, I have been around people. A lot. Relatives, my EDGE class of 100(ish), and now 50 college students in the Dells. And I'm not really the biggest fan of crowds.

Crowds do weird things to me. I think they do weird things to a lot of us. I'm an extrovert. But crowds tend to bring out a lot of my insecurities. You might not know it looking at me, but it's true.

I had this thought last week that we all have spotlights. And we all have a choice as to who we shine our spotlight on. We can shine our spotlight on ourselves, on others (and by doing so inadvertently ourselves), or on God.

And a lot of times in crowds I get tempted to shine my spotlight on myself. To seek attention and say "look at me world!" OR I want to shine my spotlight on anyone or anything besides myself. To go small and insecure. But this usually ends up pointing the spotlight right back at me since I'm still making it all about myself. So the spotlight doesn't end up on God then either, just all over the place.

The Bible talks about this in 1 Corinthians 12:12-27. 

It talks about a group of Christ-followers as a body. And it depicts parts of the body that shine the spotlight everywhere else but Christ:

If the foot should say, “Because I am not a hand, I do not belong to the body,” that would not make it any less a part of the body. And if the ear should say, “Because I am not an eye, I do not belong to the body,” that would not make it any less a part of the body.

And it also describes parts of the body that are shining the spotlight on themselves:

The eye cannot say to the hand, “I have no need of you,” nor again the head to the feet, “I have no need of you.”  

Shining your spotlight anywhere else but on God is simply comparison. When you shine it on yourself, you are choosing to live in pride and attention-seeking. When you shine it on others you are living in insecurity and fear. Either way, you aren't shining your spotlight on God, and you aren't building up His body (go take a look at the whole passage).

So instead of comparing, instead of shining our spotlight all over the place, why don't we choose to shine our spotlight on Jesus today. Why don't we make our life about Him, and not us.

Fill it in.

Right now God feels _____________ toward me or with me.

Fill it in.

What do you put there?
Loving, compassionate, delighted, attentive, proud, affectionate?
Angry, disappointed, overwhelmed, sad, disgusted, irritated?

Indifferent?

I've chosen that word- indifferent- more times than I'd like to admit. And although I don't think of it as super positive, I've never really seen it as a bad thing. Until reading this:

“The opposite of love is not hate, it’s indifference” –Elie Wiesel

So, God being indifferent about me would be one of the worst ways He could feel toward me (oops). And the thing is, this is NEVER true! God has never and will never feel indifferent toward us! He created us! 

I heard the idea recently that our deepest convictions come out of our wounds… they are what we feel and think when we lay in bed at night. So how have your wounds affected your view of how God feels about you? How does your answer to "right now God feels ___________ about me" feed into your convictions? And then what do you do with those convictions? How do you let them shape you? Your relationship with God?

What are the things that you feel and think when you lay in bed at night? How do you think these things line up with reality? That you are delighted in, cherished, and protected by an infinitely loving and forgiving Father. That you are never a disappointment, shock, or irritation to the One who created you, who chose you. This is reality. (Just check out Ephesians 1 if you don't believe me).

So, instead of filling in for God how you think He feels about you, why don't you ask Him? Keep your eyes open as you read His Word, be attentive to His still, small whisper. Ask Him to make you aware (through whatever means He chooses) of how how He really feels about you, what He thinks about you.

Jesus says “Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you." So go after it confidently...

You might just be surprised to see how the blank is filled in. And I will bet that you won't find the word indifferent in there.